Same Song, Different Tune
There’s not much to say about the game itself. We stepped on our enormous dicks. Now we move on. Our dicks aren’t any smaller, they’re just a little worse for wear.
There is a therapy group that meets at The Fieldhouse (3rd Base) every night of the week. The counselors are named Jack Daniels and Jose Cuervo. If you’re having trouble coping with the loss, Jack and Jose will be glad to help you get through it. Andyram has estimated that his recovery time will require drinking for five months straight. That might not be long enough.
If you can honestly say that the better football team won this game, you are full of shit. Most Iowa State fans are full of shit, so I know what kind of response that statement is going to get. If this game was played 100 times, Iowa would probably win 99 out of 100 times. We’re just that much better, and I think that the rest of the season and the NFL draft will show that.
It’s hard to make a case for Iowa State or any of their players being better than Iowa from a statistical standpoint. Albert Young clearly outplayed Stevie Hicks. Hodge and Greenway were as good as advertised with 13 tackles apiece. It’s painful to watch Tony Yelk try to kick. The only position that is up for debate is quarterback, but Bret Meyer’s performance was nothing to get excited about. 154 yards, 1 TD, and 1 pick is a pretty average performance that just happened to be good enough to get the job done.
This game comes down to turnovers, and we were definitely uncharacteristic in that category. It’s tough to win a game when you turn the ball over 5 times, even against a team as bad as Iowa State. Not surprisingly, they scored all 23 points off turnovers. That, and losing your starting quarterback is never a good thing. At least he caused his own concussion by being a hard ass–there’s no shame in that.
But, as it turned out, we didn’t come out ahead this time. It made me sick, and it wasn’t because of all the Coronas I drank before the game, which was a lot. I would rather lose an arm than lose to Iowa State. Although the world has been turned upside down, it’s not going to end. We’ve got a few things going for us:
The overall series is so lopsided, I quit counting.
It’s 35-18, in case you were wondering. In the grand scheme of things, this loss is just a small chink in the armor of Iowa’s dominance in this series. Overall success over the past few years has been just as lopsided. There’s not much need to elaborate. I’ll just mention three 10 win seasons, three top ten finishes, two Big Ten titles, two bowl game victories, and one BCS appearance and leave it at that. Speaking of BCS appearances…
The last time we lost to Iowa State, we went 11-1 and played in the Orange Bowl.
Iowa State went on to drop 6 of their last 7 games, including an embarrassing loss to Boise State in the Humanitarian Bowl. I can deal with losing to ISU every year if we end up in a BCS game. I don’t know why we need to lose to some worthless program at the beginning of every year to end up being successful, but that’s the way it’s been. This year’s team is still loaded and is certainly capable of winning out, or at worst ending up with the same record as last year.
Now that Iowa State has won the only game that matters to them, they will undoubtedly proceed to get stomped by a few Big 12 teams. Luckily, they play in the Big 12 north, which probably has enough cupcakes for them to squeak in to a bowl game with 6 wins after you throw in preseason wins against perennial powerhouses like Illinois State and Army. They can keep being mediocre and making bowl games that nobody cares about. We’ll just keep kicking ass, winning in bunches, and playing in bowl games that actually matter.
The joy of winning is temporary; You’re ugly for life.
It’s an awfully good deed for us to give a win to ISU fans so that they can forget about their worthless lives for a while. Tailgating with a bunch of ISU fans is like going to the state fair. Look left, look right, look all around… all you see is ugly people.
The one consolation Iowa fans have after a day like Saturday is that most of us get to go back to Iowa City and get back to “scamming on hot 19 year olds in miniskirts”*. ISU fans are stuck in Lames, bound for a life of guys in straw hats and overalls and “cornfed babes” that are so ugly that they could enter the state fair as livestock. Thank God for Iowa City.
This post is dedicated to all of you ISU bitches that couldn’t resist rubbing it in. I feel confident in saying that hell will freeze over before this series gets tied up. But keep rooting for a losing cause if you want. Please excuse us while we move on to bigger and better things.
*Quote by Andy Knaack
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I’d like to comment on the reference to ISU girls and livestock. A girl I graduated with was the Pork Queen in 04′. She’s a cheerleader for their sorry program. Nuff’ said.
Ever hear of a fat cheerleader? I bet shes fat. Fatty fat fat.
Also, anyway. Hawk fans should be pretty happy that we turned the ball over 5 times, and managed to stay in the game until late in the 4th quarter.
Anyone that thinks that Bret Meyer was amazing in the game is an idiot. Simple as that.
Anyone notice how much in favor of ISU the ABC announcers were? It was sickening. They just kept praising Stevie Nix (Hicks) on his 110 some odd yards on 28 carries (not to mention they were all at the end of the game), while Albert Young rumbled for 140 yards on 18 carries.
We’ll see you in January, Cyclones. Oh wait, nevermind. You’ll be playing in mid-December.
Ya, we all know that the best bowl that state will get is like the Humanitarian or the Gaylord Hotels Bowl. Ive been telling Iowa State people that they should go back and take their 1912 Conference Trophy (since that is the last conference trophy they have won) and stick it up all of their shitty schools asses. I think I can speak for all of Iowa City in saying “You still suck…kiss our black and gold ass!”
sour grapes…all of you. Take the loss like men.
Hogwash. This is nothing more than an effort to put a positive spin on an ugly loss. In fact, most of the article and the comments are nothing more than people restating facts. You’ll always be playing second fiddle in this state. Deal with it.
the hawks bent over and took it up the ass dry. they handed that game to them. 5 tournovers wow and not to mention the ISU defense shut you down. there was no chance after the 3rd quarter NONE dont tell yourself different it didnt matter how your defense was playing because we had all the momentum. plus your quarter showed his true brains and took on a big black man almost head to head like a true retard you lost deal with it
That true retard would be the best QB in the history of ISU football and also has two Jan. 1 bowl game rings to show for it. Cool thought though.
Hawkize Rule #1: If you read and write at a 4th grade level, you probably don’t belong at this site. That eliminates most Iowa State students, and it definitely eliminates Herbie.
Once again, for those of you who struggle with comprehension: I am not denying that we lost, nor am I compiling a list of excuses for it. I’m simply making a point that Iowa clearly has the upper hand, both recently and historically. The facts speak for themselves.
Oh Cole.. You always have some excuse.
Just wanted to let you know that whenever I said “Fuck Iowa” on Saturday, I always added, “Except #14″ at the end
I thought you’d be proud…
I’ll be at the Illinois game. Hope your spirits have been lifted by then, buddy!!
Drew Tate has bigger testicles than the Big 12 Title Trophy.
I’m a Hawkeye fanatic, and I’m stuck in the worst place possible… Lames. These people just don’t shut up here. They keep ranting and raving about their “unbelievable effort” and their “absolutely incredible victory.” A win that was more or less handed to them. This town sucks donkey balls and the people here are brain-dead retards. I need to get a real job in IC instead of living here in Buttpack. I let the ISU fans gloat all they want. After all, they have little else to live for.
I just visited cyclones.com to do some reasearch for a post, and what’s the first thing I see?
A popup ad selling a victory tee:
http://store.fansonly.com/marketplace/store_contents.cfm?store_id=247&product_id=69968&dept_id=4402&partner_id=5172
You know you don’t win many games when you start making shirts for wins. They must not know that you’re supposed to make shirts for bowl game wins. They haven’t won enough of those to catch on yet, I guess. I’m dumbfounded…
Speaking of taking it up the ass dry, do I need to bring KY when I move into Iowa City??
No your ass is loose enough from Lames. Have fun at your “Participation” bowl bitch.
Alright, we’re done here… Hawkeye Queer probably is too because we have less tolerance for ISU fans who want to come here and run their mouths. If he doesn’t quit being a jerkoff, we’ll change the comment system.